Saturday, August 15, 2009

Chaos and Order, and Main Things...

It's amazing to me how fast things go from order to chaos. I was just reading that the natural tendency of everything in the universe is to move from order to disorder. I believe scientists call it "the law of entropy". How true it is with housework and even relationships. It's amazing how much of my day centers around keeping things orderly in my home and the relationships herein. Actually I would say that 95% or my time is spent on my house, my children, and my husband. Those are my priorities and it's amazing to me how much time, energy, thought, and effort those things take!

I get a free little magazine each month from Focus on the Family. It has great articles. Dr. Dobson was replying to a question about the natural progression of a marriage heading toward being more distant instead of more intimate. Dr. Dobson answered explained about the natural principle called "the law of disintegration" He writes..."the natural tendency is for husbands and wives to drift away from each other unless they work at staying together...it is as though they were sitting in separate rowboats on a choppy lake. If they don't paddle vigorously to stay in the same neighborhood, one will drift to the north of the lake, and the other to the south. That is exactly what happens when marital partners get too busy or distracted to maintain their love. If they don't take the time for romantic activities and experiences that draw them together, something precious begins to slip away. It doesn't have to be that way, of course, but the currents of life will seperate them unless efforts are made to remain together. I wish every newly married couple knew about the law of disintegration and actively protected their relationship from it."

How true it is. Life sometimes gets in the way of what is most important. Having Christ at the center of marriage is really the key to true unity and oneness...but even that takes work from both sides. Walking in communion w/ Christ and our spouse takes some forethought and consious effort...especially as life gets busier. Taking time to talk, even, takes T-I-M-E! Adding children and long work hours makes it especially pertinent to focus on those main things.

I've been more conscious the past couple days of really focusing on my children and the Lord, especially. Walking in communion w/ the Lord throughout my day has been something I'm seeking to do. I don't have lots of time to read. Somedays I'm able to snatch some time, if I wake up before everyone, but instead about getting distressed about my lack of Bible-reading...I've decided to look for a solution. For this season of my life, it's having the frame of mind to focus on Christ, regardless of whether I have my devotion time or not. Some days, it just doesn't happen. I don't always need more information, I just need to live out what I already know. Living in continual communion w/ Christ is my goal. Praying w/out ceasing(mostly silently), memorizing the Word and singing w/ my children has helped me set my focus on the Lord throughout my day.

I've also been reminded to really require first-time-obedience out of my kids. It is saving my sanity and my patience. I don't have to yell or get mad. After the first time they don't listen, or disobey,or whine...then I can calmly point out their disobedience and hand out the consequence. I've seen a lot of improvement just after a few days. But goodness, that takes constant diligence and lots of patience! I think a lot of times I get so focused on the job at hand, I don't notice that Samuel didn't obey what I told him to do and Madeline is into the "no touch" items again, and William is usually off getting into something. :) Reminding my 4 and 2 year old 5 times, get's old really fast and grates on me. It's that ability to prioritize my kids over the ever-important job I'm doing. "People over Projects", right?! Well,I'm working on it. ;) Easier said than done!

I'm also really been working w/ them on picking up after themselves and having them "help" me w/ housework. They think it's way more fun than playing w/ toys by themselves, plus I have the hope that they'll be doing these chores by themselves in a few years. I was explaining to Justin that to accomplish any given task takes twice as long and makes twice as much mess! That's ok, I'm wanting to teach my kids to have fun working and hoping to tie heartstrings w/ them at the same time.

Deep cleaning the bathroom was on my list to do this week. I had the shower and the floor left to do. I gathered 2 old coffee containers, filled them halfway up w/ water and put a scrubbrush in each one, and told the boys that they were going to help me wash the bathroom floor. They had a blast. We had lots of water on the floor, but it did get cleaned and they had fun "helping" me in the process. We did the same thing when I cleaned out the car. Goodness, I cannot believe how much stuff was in my car, that didn't belong there! While I vacuumed, the boys and Madeline washed the floor mats w/ the same containers and scrub brushes. It was nice to have them occupied and not wandering off in 3 different directions while I was in conquer mode. I think sucessful mothering is 75% creativity and thinking ahead.

My house is in continual need to cleaning and organizing. I pretty much stay up w/ the cleaning and tidying. It's the organizing part that really takes some time. I love to be organized and have everything in it's place. Right now, my closets and drawers are disasters. I keep thinking I'll go through and organize everything once the weather turns cold. I'm just not sure I can wait that long. It really eats at me. I guess I just haven't made it a priority because it makes a huge mess to organize and go through stuff and we've been doing lots outside. Keeping up w/ my garden and freezing sauces has kept me busy...too busy to organize closets or blog. Some months it's good if I have time to balance the checkbook and organize my pictures and write out checks!

So...here's to being disciplined enough to add the elbow grease it takes to manage a home well, train up children, and invest in marriage...all w/ God's grace and help.
*Happy Weekend* Monday's a new week! Yeah!

3 comments:

The Millers said...

i read that same thing the other day. may be true about relationships but it reminds me of our house. haha

wilby, sorry 'bout your diaperless state I left you in the other night but, as we are both middle children, I think we understand each other. it's hard being us.

luv you buddy!!

-auntie theresie

Vanderpolclan said...

Megan that is a wonderful, honest, post. You have the right perspective and the ambition to see what is important. Yes, training your children in first time obedience takes time and time away from other things that need doing, but you will reap the rewards in the future. Great idea on how to have them help you with the floor. Yes, it took more time, but it is time invested for the future, because one day soon you will be the supervisor and not the worker:). That time will come sooner than you think. It is a busy time you are in, but you have your priorities right and your mind right before Christ. He will bless that.

Cindy

Littlecarlotta said...

Great thoughts! Thanks for sharing.

aliza